Painting All Things New

Making a decision is kind of like painting a picture. There are many factors, colors, brushes, circumstances, pieces, people, ideas, and possibilities that go into making each decision. We use these different aspects in different ways and consider them all to make the picture that we want. Each picture is part of a bigger picture. Or life is not always a series of different pictures, but perhaps one large picture with many intricate details, layers the build upon each other, and subtleties that only a few people will draw near enough to notice.

This idea popped into my head this morning after a unique night. (I've been sleeping with my lamp on next to my bed. I realized I have really weird/bad dreams if the light was off. I thought I was just afraid of the dark until I realized that my old teammate who lived here last year had the same issue. No lights - bad dreams; lights on - no bad dreams. I remembered that last year I never slept with the light on so I began to put the pieces together that something else was in this room that didn't like the light. It's just one of those things that I got used to but probably shouldn't have. Last night the light bulb popped and burnt out as I headed to bed. Oh crap. "Do you trust me?" I heard Him say. Its an opportunity for faith. Do I rebuke what's in the room and count on G coming through or do I go find another light bulb? I felt the sense of fear come over me as the idea of what was lurking waiting to rush in in the night to bother me. I should go get a light bulb... but wait. "Do you trust me?" Yes...I think so.

As I stood there in the middle of my room two thoughts were going through my head, the fear of evil surging and coming into my room and the peace that He is stronger and He says "Use my Name, rebuke it, and I will take care of it." I went back and forth before I realized that He doesn't use fear to direct us. The Book says that "Perfect Love casts out fear." (1John4:18) Fear isn't from Him. He gives warning, but not with the fear that things aren't going to be okay. He told us "fear not" 365 times in His love letter to us. "He did not give us a spirit of fear but of power and love and self-control." (2 Tim. 1:7) He's not in the scaring business, He's in the restoring and painting new life business. (I think we need to change our view of Him. Apologizing for accepting the lie that He gives us fear in situations. (Fear of God is different. When you fear God, you're not afraid that He's going to strike evil and wrath on you - that's not His character to do that. For those who are in JC, JC has taken all of the wrath and has defeated evil. He now lives in us. We don't need to fear and honestly give the evil one too much attention when we do.) He brings life, promises, and glory to His name. But doesn't use fear to get us to do something.

Fear is considering something is bigger and has more control than G does. Worrying is doubting G is good and has the best for us and is in control. We need to, I need to remember His character and who He's said He is and how He's proven it.

So fear is a massive paint brush that we tend to use. Unfortunately, you can't control it well and it blocks off large parts of the canvas. It makes chunks of paint in odd places. It smears beautiful little details so intricately placed by the master artist. It messes up the process He's working with. Yes, He can fix them, but He never intended to be using fear to guide you. He's not a G of threats and fear. He's a G of patience and power and love.

As I fell asleep did I have any fear? Yes. To be honest, I still had fear. But I knew He was asking me to trust Him and I wrote these things as I fell asleep: J, I trust in you because you've came through. You've always came through. You've never not come through. So why should I not trust you? J here I am. I trust you. Please come through and protect me. Awaken me with rest and with increased affections for You. For Your Holy Name J we pray and ask in Your name. Amen.

I awoke without being bothered in the night, with good dreams, and the thought:

Fear (of lacking) is never a brush to be used to make decisions.
I make all things new again.