How Great?

The Empire State Building stands 1,250 feet tall and has 102 stories. Whew. I heard once that if you dropped a penny from the top of it, it would kill someone at the bottom because of the force it has. That's a long way, that's a big building.

When we look at it in comparison to the skyline around it, it dominates the scene. There's no question it's the tallest. If you were to go to the top, you could and would see everything around you for as far as the atmosphere allowed. You never doubt how tall it is - that it's one of the tallest, biggest, greatest buildings....for Americans.

I bring up this story because a student/friend of mine brought it to my attention this last week and it's such a good point. My friend, C, became a Family member 3 years ago and just left for his senior internship in the Spring Semester. I've gotten to know him pretty well and to talk about a lot of things. He has good English and can think in the western way and gets western humor, so it's much easier to communicate and just hang out with him. When he first came to believe his physical appearance changed - it was as if the weight of his shoulders were lifted off. In the next year, he was completely transformed, much more outgoing, confident, his classmates turned to him and respect him and pretty much the awesomeness of the Good News carried out. As time went on, the weight of the world came back again and his shoulders started to slump. As I met him last year he was still outgoing but throughout the year I could see it settle back on him again.

This semester has been very hard for him with looking for a job, preparing to leave college (he's from the south part of China so he's lived in the north for 5 years and only went home for about a week or so throughout the year), he's grown tremendously and found true community here, but he's made some difficult choices, had an intense heartbreak with a girl, found himself secluded from his classmates and friends, and attacked with lies and some cultural businesses practices that grind against his new Self. Many things we've been able to work through and overcome, but there's still a constant bashing down on him from unseen things and the lack of love being there. He's been searching for love and just can't quite get it, can't connect, can't feel it.

It got to the point this last week he called me asking me to kill him. He is a little overdramatic at times, but his near tears on the other end of the line told me I needed to take this call seriously. As we talked he just cried out, "why can't I feel His love anymore?! Does He not love me? Why can't I feel it? I just want to feel it!" He had been searching for it for weeks and months. In the search he started looking for love other places - in friends and fellowship, in school work, in getting his drivers license (a huge deal here), in his future job, in his employers, in working out, and in the occasional slip back to drinking for a night.

At lunch a few days later, we talked and he expressed his frustration:

"You know, it's like when you see the buildings in Changchun and you think That building is huge and it's got to be so tall! (buildings here are easily 10-20 stories), but then you see the Burj Khalifa in India and you realize that these buildings are nothing. It's the same way with His love," he said in mid-tears.

The Burj Khalifa in Dubai, India stands 2, 723 feet tall, has 160 floors and is the tallest building in the world.

"I thought I knew what love was and happiness was, but then when I met Him and I became a [believer] that I realized what love really was and how big it really was. Now all of those other things seem so weak and so useless."

The Burj Khalifa stands more than twice as tall as the Empire State Building - what we as Americans think is tall is really the world's little brother to the Indian Giant.

"Now that I've seen His love, now that I've felt it. I can't go back. There's no way to go back. There's nothing else that satisfies. I just need His love. I need to feel it again."

The Burj Khalifa in Dubai, India stands dwarfing every other building in sight. It's from here that you can see the ends of the earth. It does not back down. It is not shaken. It cannot be compared to, and once you see it, you can never go back to looking at any other building thinking it's tall.

"I'm not sure how I ever lived before this. How did I survive? I mean, somehow I made it through, but I don't know how I lived without it. I can't live without it again."

So I ask you to join us in Asking for an increase of His tangible Love. We have seen it and we can never go back to being ok. We can never go back to just getting by. Our soul crumbles and our hearts fail without. My friend is not the only one to feel this lacking and questioning of His Love this semester. It has happened to my team and I and other Chinese family members. (I know we serve and honor Him not because of feelings, but I'm not talking about feelings I'm talking about Him coming through to answer our calls, to comfort and give peace, to increase our faith.) How great of a lie is it for the evil one to attack the authority, size, and character of the Great One? How much does it break the Father's heart when we begin to doubt His love for us? We seek Greater Love - to return, to embrace, to give - but first we must receive it.

Thanks for your love and I ask that we all would give up our Empire State Buildings and look for the dwarfing of even the Burj Khalif. His love is greater than we can imagine and fathom. But I want to try so He can make it larger. I want to see Him in His full size and glory and somehow be able to begin to respond.

Please increase our view of you and our ability to experience it and then ability to respond accordingly.