Getting back on the horse...

I didn't really fall off of the horse with this blog, but I have been off of it and I hope to get back onto it and be a more "frequent rider/writer" than I have been lately. This update might be a little bit longer, but I'll try to keep them more frequent and short.

SNOW! As you have seen by the last pictures that we got our first snow a few weeks ago. We cracked the first week of November and the heavens opened up. A few inches the first night, then two days later a few more inches, then the next day a few more inches. We probably had 6-7 inches by the end of the week. The downside to this is that the students have to go out and clean up the sidewalk. If they don't have class, their job is to clear the sidewalks. So after the first snow all my students loved the snow. Now, they're not as big of fans of it. Yeah, any sidewalks, concrete or roads are cleared by shovels, wooden signs (which are flipped and used as shovels), and those giant wisk-broom-looking things. I asked one student and they said, "well, if we didn't clear the snow, then the school would have to pay someone to come and do it." My thought was, "well duh, you're paying a lot of money to come here, they can afford it", but I guess it's a different mindset here.

I gave them midterms last week. They had to do group presentations about a topic we had covered in class. What's worse is that I had to grade them on pronunciation, grammar, and fluency. Man, I don't know who was more nervous them or me. I think it took me about as long to figure out their notes and grade during the class after the presentation as it did for them to give their presentation. I was so glad when that week was over. I feel bad giving these sweet little kids a bad grade. (Alright, some of them who don't pay attention in class, it was easier to drop them down a few points, but the ones who try and just don't do very well, it's difficult.)

It was pretty cool because He knew I was freaking out about having to judge and grade them, so He signed me up to be a judge for Foreign Song Competition for the Bilingual department.  I should have probably guessed that I was going to do something when my students kept asking me if I was coming or not.
So I showed up and they asked me if I could help judge. I said, "uh, ok. I guess I can if you want me to." Then they showed me to my seat with my name tag and score sheet... nice. The song Foreign Song Competition was pretty interesting. I really enjoyed it. There were some contestants who could have been on American Idol, one for her good ability and one for her...spunk...and dancing. The only downside to this competition was the fact that it was for the bilingual department... aka not just English. So when they sang in German and Japanese and Korean it was difficult to give an accurate reading of whether it sounded native or not. There were German, Japanese, and Korean teachers there too judging, but I still had to vote. Jordan helped me vote and we thought that most of them sounded pretty legit to us, so we treated them alright.

The last thing I wanted to let you know about is our new Boy. Man, he growing so fast. I'm so glad that the Sprite has cracked open that noggin of his. It's just flowing with questions and comments and insights and all sorts of things. Less than a week after his Birth, he finished up Matthew's story and fell in love with our Hero's last words. "Go to all nations... and surely I am with you." Our boy wrote it down on a piece of paper and was telling it to his classmates during class- this is what He said and this is what He promises and ..... He's going at it. It's amazing. He's not just like excited about what he's learning, but he's being intentional and seeking out people and saying "I want you to experience this joy. I don't want you to go there, but I want you to be in the Kingdom." It's beautiful. In fact, we're about to go watch the Passion for the first time with him and two others who are in the seeking process. It's going to be hard, but good. Just asking for open hearts and understanding.

Love you all and wish you could see what's happening here.

P.S. as a moment of truth. I tend to wait til things are on the upswing or going better to email people back or blog or do different things. I don't want to wallow it in or express it. So if it's been a while or if I haven't emailed you back (and I'm just behind on that anyways) or things are kind of quiet - I might be having a rough time and could use some extra vertical thoughts. Thanks.

First SNOW!

Even though it's been cold enough to snow many many days for the last month, we got our first little covering. So I wanted to put some pictures up that you could enjoy it too. Unfortunately, I don't have a lot of time to tell you about what's going on because I have to give a oral mid-term in less than an hour. Gulp. I don't know whose more nervous them for giving it, or me for having to grade it.

The view from Jordan's room on the 6th floor over looking the campus at 12:30am this morning.

The view out of my window at 7am this morning.

40 Days...

How do you describe the last 40+ days?
It would cheapen His work in my life and in my heart, and in the world around me to describe in one word, but, alas, I don't have days to write it and you dont have days to read it. Like John once said at the end of his story, "if everything He did was written down, I suppose the world wouldn't have enough room for all the books." That is true. But simplified in a few phrases: roller coaster, exhausting, near visible warfare, ridiculous, surreal, challenging, and the thought "really?!"

It seems like which part of the day you asked me how the day is going, will my answer change. My days/emotions have been on more of a roller-coaster ride and change faster than the cravings of a pregnant woman.  I've walked down stairs heading to class and wanted to collapse in tears and just lay there, but I had class in 15 min, so I couldn't do that. I asked and felt the Spirit strengthening me. Made it through the first class, got to share some. Had lunch with a student who asked, "what is the purpose of your life?" (REALLY?!) Wow! Then coming off the H.S. high and crashed hard during the next class. It looked up a little as I got to eat dinner with students, and as I went back to lesson plan thought, "am I really teaching them anything? Am I doing my job? Man, I suck at this! They probably won't allow me to come back. They've never asked anyone to leave mid-year, but I might be getting close."  Some days I've thought, I could stay here for years and do this - this is where it's at. There's so much here! Then later that same day thought, I won't make it til Christmas, I don't think I can do it. Get me out of here, but to where?

Since I've stopped blogging, I quit focusing on the physical explanations and I've learned and been aware of so much more of the "supernatural" than the physical. How the supernatural can and does effect the physical- both with supernatural attack/warfare from the enemy and supernatural sustaining when it's not possible. Many times in America, we only give the supernatural side of things a very small acknowledgment in our lives. Here, we live in the supernatural side and the physical side comes along with it.

"Don't let your experiences dictate your thol. but let your theol. dictate your experiences." Does what you've experienced or feel help you understand what you read? OR does what you read make you redefine what just happened or what you feel. What is love? Not how you have experienced it,but what does It say? Now how does that change what you see of what just happened? Who is He? Is that from what  you've experienced of Him or what it says about Him? Can you prove it? With many denom. and backgrounds... and a language barrier here, I've had to dig in and prove it by seeing exactly what it says. Many things I have thought or tried to reason out (maybe from my experiences have been wrong and I've had to restructure much of what I've thought.) I feel like I've went from serving meals to people to having to go back and be fed milk now. It's very humbling to know the thing that you have the most pride in, is your relationship with Him. Then he breaks that bride down by scrambling your relationship.

It has been good because I've learned it's very easy to see a mis-guided or a false representation of different things based upon our experiences first. For example: I realized I had a skewed version of who He is because as He is the authority figure I saw Him as like a cop wanting to protect you, so he catches your every move. Or a judge who is stand for justice so much that he almost begrudgingly gives out forgiveness - like He sighs and shakes His head as He gives me more forgiveness. All of these views from past authority figures, yelling from coaches, look from principles, the flexed muscle of the cop - all of these have helped me define HIS authority. But that's not what I read. Yes, He is the judge, but He also willingly, generously gives out forgivness. I mean, if He gave everything so that you and I could have it, why would he begrudgingly give it out. I mean, He is joyed as He gives it out. To the woman who was busted in the middle of adultery he could have given her the look, scolded her, picked up a stone, but he just said, "Go and sen no more." Do you think He had a smile on His face when He said it? Like, YOU'RE FREE! Now GO :-D! One example, alot of what I'm redefining is just who He is. What is identity is and then how we fit into that... aka what our identity is?

-Many times I've asked, "Really?!" In my relationship or talking about the Book, "I can't understand this... I've taught this before! Really?!"
-Then you have my student, whose English isn't that good but suddenly improves to ask me, "What is the aim of your life?" Really?!
-I mentioned going to a Fellowship here with a student after lunch, the next week 7 students came with me to the Fellowship. It was their first time. Really?!
-I got to have lunch and talk with and share my Heart to the assistant dean of our department. Really?!
-A student I have isn't a Family member yet, but is now reading the Book for and hour and half each day and coming up with very difficult questions to answer. Really?!
-A student randomly breaks out his Chinese Book to show me in class one day. Really?!
-They want our team to perform at a city-wide banquet on a stage with lights, curtains, the whole nine yards - in front of a few hundred people. Really?!
-Went to play pool with a student and because I was American they turned the music to English in the pool hall for me. Really?!

I could go on and you'll be getting a letter soon with a few more details, but a few thoughts have stuck and I wanted to share to end.
--Does your theol. dictate your experience or experience dictate your theol.?
--At the end of Wall-E he says, "I don't want to survive, I want to live!" That has become a very important idea that I've been asking for. I don't want to just survive today or this week, but I want to thrive. I feel pretty rough, but I don't want to just survive and make it through this next class, I want you to show up in an amazing way.

I've been learning more about the Sprite and thinking vertically and listening to Him more. One thought He's been crying out in my soul is "We need more workers. Send more. Get more. The campus is so ripe so ready." There are 9 of us Americans (with both teams) and a pretty solid movement of Family members on campus, but I feel like we more here. There just aren't enough of us to share with all of them so hungry, so open. Whether or not it's my place to stay, I don't know yet. If this is where He asks me to stay, then I'll be here and it will keep growing; if this is not the place, He will not use me here and I should move on.It's so much about what He is doing. It's been ridiculous of the things they asked and how it comes up. It is completely His work, but I've learned even more what it is to sacrifice even more, to give up it ALL (and I'm still far from) but to see how He works in those surrendered and intentional. It is amazing.

Thanks for reading this all and for continuing to remember us. 
He hears and is answering. I wish you could see His work here.

"Apart From Me, You Can Do Nothing"

It’s easy to say, it’s harder sometimes for me to believe, and it’s even harder for me to keep in practice. Abide. That’s what He says, abide. Abide- “to dwell.” To abide in Him means continually spending time with Him, but not just logging in your hours, it means to listen, to follow, to change your course of action to follow His plan and desires – that’s how you stay with Him. Surprisingly, the word or concept of “compromise” was not in this definition like I often try to put it. He calls us to come and die to our thoughts, plans, and dreams, not to come and bring our negotiations to the table. Why would the one who knows the good and perfect way need my input on how to make it better?

I'm leaving what I have behind to follow One who knows better. I don’t think it’s this strict “get over yourself” type of attitude, but I thinks because He knows better and I don’t. It’s that I cannot pour out what I have not received. The Love I give is only an overflow of what I am given. In this current stage, I feel as if I'm lacking in Love, I'm not loving Him the way I should and therefore not able to Love those around me the way I could. His Love is not contingent upon my actions, there’s nothing I can do to make Him Love me any more or less. There’s nothing you can do to make Him love you any more or less. But, our actions allow us to experience it more, to draw close to His heart, to feel the warmth of His embrace. Then, it’s the overflow of that joy and Love that we can Love Him and turn and pour out.

“Ok good, that makes sense, but why do you say all of this” you may be asking. Yes, I’m in China. Yes, I’m trying to serve Him. Yes, I’ve given up a year of my life, but that doesn’t mean it’s easy to give up my days, my evenings, my mornings, my hours, my minutes to Him.

A few days ago, I was talking to a few friends on Skype about Him and what I was learning and it began to click. I just wasn’t Loving Him well. I was trying to Love my teammates, I was trying to Love my officemates, I was trying to Love the students, but I wasn’t Loving Him first. I was reading in the morning and in the evening, thinking vertically, but I wasn’t listening. “In his heart a man plans his course, but [He] determines his steps.” I wasn’t giving Him my steps, my full day’s attention, listening as to how I could love Him first, and as I sat there, He began to show me how.

It was like my wife was sitting behind me and I was too busy talking on the computer to everyone else rather than with her. I was talking about her and about the time we had had together, but I wasn’t just spending that time really adoring her, really showing her my affection. I would talk to her before I went to bed, like a routine step before I went to sleep, a quick kiss on the cheek and rolling over to go to sleep. No Love, no affection, no yearning of my heart for her, no just staring at her while my head was on the pillow telling her how much I love her, how much I just love being with her. There was no thankfulness for her being there with me. As it was, there was no affection shown to Him either. No words saying, “I love you, I love just being here with you. Thank you for being here with me.” (I know I’m young and not married and have a lot to learn, but I think some nights, I’m going to want to get off the computer, turn off the TV, stop doing work, and just go to bed early to lay down and just sit in silence with my bride.) In the same way, I want to put it all away just to go spend time in silence with Him, just listening and Loving.

A few days ago, I started a new quiet time book. It’s a 40-day book that challenges you to fast from something for 40 days as you put that time into honestly seeking Him and Loving Him. After thinking and asking about what it was that I could fast, there was only one answer, my blog. I tried the compromise technique of not doing it as often, or giving up other things, but giving up the blog is the answer I kept getting. I know it’s not logical- it’s good for me to get to share with all of you what’s going on, it’s good for me to get to keep in mind what it is that He’s doing, it’s good for you to see what it is that you’re a part of, it’s good for us both to grow closer to Him, and it’s good for me to let you know how you can lift us up. Yeah, I’m afraid that if I don’t keep you connected then you might forget about me and not ask Him for help as much (an honest fear)…. But with all the reasons I threw out there, I had the same response: Abide. Apart from me you can do nothing. I’m not always logical, but I know what’s better for you. You do not know what this will do for both you and for them if you obey me. “The beauty is in the obedience.”

So I am being obedient. I ask this of you: over the next 40 days that you would join with me even more, that together, we would seek Him. Take the time you would spend normally reading this and talk to Him. Ask Him how you can lift us up (He knows better than I do anyways). But along with that, lets seek Him together. Really, really seek Him. To put aside something for 40 days and put Him in that place. Together, as we seek Him rather than seeking to do something, to be productive, to be effective, to be powerful, but just seeking Him – then the Love with overflow. We say seek a lot, but another term is "to actively pursue." The J-man, used the idea of a lost sheep, or a lost coin, or a lost son; what if we searched like we lost our cell phone, our pay check, or an expensive gift someone had let us borrow and they were coming over to get it back - using that type of desperation to pursue Him, and with the Love and affection and passion of trying to woo the girl of your dreams to be yours. That's what I want us to do, to be, to join together in.

I’ll still be using email, so feel free to email me (I might be a little slow returning it, but will get to it asap). I’ll still be on Facebook and Skype occasionally, if you’d like to try to get a hold of me there or check out any new pictures I get posted. The keys is not just “to not do something” but it’s to take that time and effort and heart put into it and spend it Loving Him in the process. So I hope you’ll join me.

I want you to know how much I love you all and how much I appreciate every one of you. I look forward to sharing with you more in emails, and newsletters, and in 40 days back on this blog, if that plan works out. Thank you and I love you (but not as much as He does.)

Abram

Happy 1 Month Anniversary!

It's official. We've been in China for one month today. To celebrate... Happy Teachers Day! It's a country-wide holiday. I guess it's kinda like Mother's Day or Father's Day. The students bring teachers presents and people all tell you Happy Teacher's Day. Unfortunately, I don't have students yet, but my office workers were nice and shared some candy and cake with me from their students.

In honor of the one month tradition. I've been keeping little one-liners of things I've noticed or found interesting over the past month. So I hope you enjoy.

-It's illegal to spit in Beijing. (They stopped it for the Olympics.)
-A smile is the same in every language.
-There is a 13th floor but no 14th floor.
-A man standing next to a woman is the universal sign for bathroom.
-Even names are collective rather than individual - last name/family name first.
-The same gene that causes blue eyes also causes you to be bad with chopsticks - 4 of out of the 5 of us have blue eyes, the one is Chinese-American, but we do just fine.
-Recess can be canceled in Beijing due to too high air pollution. Today it's just
at the "unhealthy" level. Upgraded from yesterday.
-Boil the water before you drink it, even the local have to.
-Honking the horn is not rude or because you did anything wrong, it's
sent as an "I'm here. Just to let you know I'm coming through."
-He has a habit of working outside of me, of doling work without
my help, permission, or ideas.
-Chinese toilet paper is not as perforated as the U.S., and it's more elastic.
-Coming to China as a westerner, is intentionally putting yourself in a
fish tank to be looked at over and over again.
-In my first attempt to hail a taxi, the driver waved at me... I think
I'm doing something wrong.
-Tried shrimp flavored Pringles too for the first time... I know why
there not big in the U.S.
-"Only 3 types of people can make up words: writers, English teachers,
and George W Bush."
-Only in China can you say, "Here eat this." "What is it?" "I don't know
just try it." "Alright."
-The Great Wall probably isn't able to be seen from space since it's
about as wide as a road at most.
-The Great Wall it's slanted so that rain would run off the flat spots.
-I fell asleep on the way back from the Great Wall and woke up to most
of the bus singing "A Whole New World" from Aladdin. It was magical.
Best alarm clock ever.
- The song "Times" by Tenth Ave North is just in time.
-Thank you for the sunshine even when we can't see it,
Thank you for your love even when we can't feel it,
Thank you for the truth even when we don't know it.
-To cross the street, you just walk across whenever and don't get hit. You just time it to walk and not get hit.
-I went to the Wu Mart to get some groceries and bought a 12 pack of
water, Chips Ahoy, and a small jar of peanut butter and the most
expensive thing was the peanut butter, almost 3 yuan more than any
other, and still it was about $2 USD.
-Only in Beijing do you not want to drink the rain as it falls.
-Rainbows don't have the same connotations as the states.
-In foreign lands, it's hard not to seek to understand more than it is
to seek Him.
-60-70% of communication here is reading between the lines.
-Tomato crackers taste like tomato soup.
-Shrimp Pringles & Blueberry Pringles - Popular choices.
-Saw first ATM on 2.5 weeks after getting here.
-In plenty, generosity is great: in scarcity, generosity is divine.
-Had western food tonight - FREE WATER, we got FREE WATER with a meal! It was amazing and it wasn't hot water. WE GOT ICE too!
-Sitting in the lobby of the hotel, waiting on my team, I see a McDonald's motorcycle delivery driver pull up and walk in with McDonald's helmet, jacket, fanny
pack, and food warmer on back, if only I had my camera...
-Lace up your shoes, were hitting the ground running.
-There's always room for more in China - Elevator, subway, tables. There's room
for one and 3 get on.
-Pizza Hut is like a 5-star restraint here in Changchun.
-The date on the side of food is when it was packaged, not when it
expires. So don't throw it out if it's past the date... Like some of
my team.
-Su and su are very close. One means 4 and one means dying... 4 is an
unlucky number.
-I need to work in annunciation, expand, expand, expend.
-China- claustrophobics need not apply.

Thank you all for reading through this, but even more for continuing to support and lift us up. Happy 1 Month Anniversary!

Adventures to Walmart. Yes, Walmart…sort of.

This past Saturday we were able to go to a Walmart in downtown Chungchun. There’s a bus stop not too far from the school’s entrance and one of Dave’s old students went with us and brought along a friend. They were going to help us navigate and negotiate our cell phone deals. (By the way their cell phone plans work much differently than ours. Here, you buy a phone, then buy a phone number separately, and you buy minutes and texts. The phone numbers are different prices depending on the numbers you want in them. The more 4’s you have in your number the cheaper it is, the more 8’s you have in your number the more expensive it is. 8 is one of the lucky numbers here. “Su” and “Su” are the words for “4” and “die”…. 4 is an unlucky number.)

After taking a standing, hour-long bus ride with 60-70 other Chinese (a normal load, actually had Chinese room for about 20 more – we had American room for about 30 of them to get off), we arrived in Changchun. We must have hit the ritz area as there was a Gucci store and a Louis Vuitton store. Never saw them before in my life… I took pictures. They also had Nike, Jordan, Adidas stores too. We zigzagged and backtracked around the city to try and get two other phones we had unlocked for use in China, but no luck. We splurged and ate at KFC (second western food of the trip).

Then, I heard a series of words I never thought I would ever hear in my life as we walked into a mall/department store area, “Yeah, Walmart is upstairs.” … WHAT?! It turns out their Walmart is different from our walmart. Walmart, and the food department (which I don’t think believes in packaging meet, but instead just sticking it out there and letting you pick) was on the second floor and then you took an escalator up to the third floor where everything else was. I learned even more that the way we think is differently and that it extends as to what is logical to put next to each other in Walmart. We found backpacks in 3 different parts of the store, one of which was between the sports equipment and the music. They also put lamps across from the travel luggage. Needless to say, we did a lot of wondering. I felt bad for the two students who went with us because we just walked from one side of the store to the other. We would collect one thing like a wash cloth that’s with the scrub brushes thinking that there wasn’t a sponge, then go to the other side of the camping supplies and find air fresheners and sponges and pick up a sponge instead. Two hours later, we walked out with 3 bags pretty full and ready to sit down. One cool fact though was that there shopping cards are 4-wheel steering – which means you can drift your car around the turns from one aisle to another, which I did, until you hit someone else’s cart – bad idea.

In training, they told us that everything just takes longer than we expect in China. Everything takes longer, is a bigger deal, and will wear you out faster. They said you’ll go to the grocery store and when you come back, you’ll want to take a nap and people back home won’t understand. I laughed at the time, but I was so ready to crash when we got back. We left at 10am and got back just about 5pm. Whew. It was a good day.

I walked around taking pictures of all the different displays of meat for 5-7 min...until the smell got too much.

Not chicken wings! - Each of those is a claw from...something. The claw was about the size of my hand. Delicious.

Pictures.

Most of the pictures are on Facebook. Click Here to see them. These following pictures were too big to fit onto Facebook so I put them here for your enjoyment. Hope you enjoy Beijing, the Forbidden City, and Tienanmen Square.

The bridge that we crossed over walking back to the hotel at night.

This is the other side of the bridge. You can see the space needle and the reflection of the buildings along with the road along the side. Neon lights are BIG in China, the brighter the better. This is probably one of my favorite shots I've taken.

This is one of the courtyards in the Forbidden City. This is about 2 layers away from the center palace.

This is it. The main center building is in front of you, this was where the Emperor's throne was. They thought it was the center of the universe. This place is epically huge. It took 5 pictures to put this shot together.

Tienamen Square
As you first walk out of the Forbidden City, you see all of the square in front of you.

We quickly cut through the Square, but this is part of what it looks like. It's a couple hundred yards long.